Oh___Scream___BangxBang on Xanga

HACKED, BITCH. BOO MOTHER FUCKING HOO.

Oh___Scream___BangxBang

Name: Heidi
Birthday: 5/9/1900
Gender: Female

Interests: Leech with two daughters.
Give give they cry.
Her name is, she is a liar.
I refuse to be hers.
A kiss from her is one of the grave.
Bullets by her mouthfull an enemy at the six.
She simply will not die.

HxC. SxE. God;;
I'd give my life for any of them

Bane.
Comeback Kid.
TERROR
Bury your dead.
50 cent
Lil whyte
Misfits
Anti-flag
Blood Brothers
Crime Mob
Kids like us
Norma Jean
The chariot
Project X
Throwdown

I fucking stand by my friends. Fuck with them, i'll fuck with yr face. Hit me, They'll be hitting you 10 x's harder.
Image hosted by Photobucket.com

Expertise:
The bloods left on my hands
And its up to me to wash away
Its up to me to make it right
Forget the past
What's done is done
I always said so easily
Now its time that I live my words
Living in those days that hold me back
They hold me back
They hold me down
I knew this wouldn't get me far
Just away from you full of myself
And I know
That there's something inside of me
That I can give
That I can give to you

Occupation: Artist
Industry: Other

Message: message meEmail: email me
AIM:

breakyr faceexxx
AIM:

breakyr faceexxx

Member Since: 1/20/2005

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Monday, May 02, 2005

I love that no one comes to my site anymore.

mmyeah.

Things between Shawn and I are fucking gay. He treats me like shit all day but then when the day closes he says sorry. I love him, i really do. But, I am sick of this bullshit. I want to fucking cry. He says he will try harder to "prove his love to me" yet i have to BEG him to go see a really pretty cliff right down the street. Mm yeah he cares a lot. Yesterday was our 2 month anniversary and we didnt even really talk, Nor did we see eachother. Does he even care about me, seriously ? he says he loves me, but then again i dont think he does.

Next monday is my birthday, May 9th. I'm sure all of you will forget. So dont bother telling me you'll buy me something and then let me down. it happens every year.

Today has been horrid.

Did i fail to mention i went tanning for the first time and i have a sunburnt ASS?!

yeah, nice and crispy.

Darling;
Cry yr eyes out nothing can save you now
we're all crying and lying in ditches
waiting for rain to pelt our faces
i hope it washes away all yr ugly lies.

8:57 PM - 8 views - 16 eprops - 9 comments - email it

Friday, April 29, 2005

Currently Playing
Turn It Around
By Comeback Kid
see related

i hope you know
(please know)
that if you ever need anything;
i'll always be here;
to give you warm blankets
right out of the dryer,
and we can hug until you stop crying.

Today is what i've been waiting for, for a while.
It's friday.
Not only do i have two marvelous classes of chorus, but i also am going to watch a movie with my bestfriend; Mark, after school
&Then we are going to go to the show.
<3 oh boy.

Me &shawn are doing okay. But i feel like there's a million little rocks lodged into our "long road ahead of us"
Maybe it's because we're going through something really big right now.
I sure hope so.
I hope we can pull through.
[[ i've been having those nostalgic reoccuring hopes of crashing into the windshield. it's so hard to remember he loves me on days like these. ]]
&hearts; <- I don't care if that works or not.

Mark has my camera. Otherwise i'd have new pics for you guys.
I'm going to start taking more pictures and start writting my poetry again.

<3.
I miss my friends from back home like crazy.
Most of all i miss M/E/G/H/A/N
I miss the laughing until snorts, &then to silent laughing.
I miss making gummy dinosaurs and them being SICK.
I miss lighting a million candles in the dark and llistening to brand new.
I miss going to shows.
I miss finding wallet's full of money &going on shopping sprees.
I miss going to Toyrs R us.
I miss getting coffee.
I miss MC DONALDS.<3.
I miss chinese food, &our pimp waiter, lazy eight.
I love the fact that everytime you run up the stairs you hold your pants knowing i'm gonna pull them down.
I miss staying up late.
I miss gym class.
I miss you.
I fucking miss you.
I miss your face.
I miss your voice.
I hate distance.
i hate it.
[[i wish these bags of sand caved in
and you would come and wash me away]]
<3.

-today,
i got a room mate
who smelled just like you.
and it made me cry.
because i miss you-

+Your tongue is a rudder
It steers the whole ship.
Sends your words past your lips or keeps them safe behind your teeth.
But the wrong words will strand you
Come off course while you sleep.
Sweep your boat out to sea or dashed to bits on the reef. +

I wish there would be one day i didnt have to lean on you for support.
No more clenching your shoulders holding back tears.
No more salty agony pouring from my eyes.
I dont want you to feel like you need to be there
But you want to be.
So you hold me tight.
&You tell me everything is going to be okay.
For the most part, i believe you
&i would never believe anyone who would say that
Cause it sounds like the easy way out.
But i look you in your eyes &you tell me;
"it's okay, i'm going to take care of you, nothing is going to happen to you, i swear"
it makes my heart stop.
never did i think i'd find a friend that amazing in Ocala, Flordia.
You are my bestfriend.
Mark Willis.
you are amazing.

8:21 AM - 6 views - 2 eprops - 1 comment - email it

Monday, April 25, 2005

Oh my lord.

this recap is going to be long

Saturday- I went to shawns &we hun gout alllll day. it was so awesome. We ate like, so much food you have no idea. We shot some pool. &whether he likes it or not i would have won the past couple of times if i wouldnt have scrached the 8ball mk? &I seem to be getting more respect from his dad's girlfriend now that i'm edge, She is allowing me and shawn to be alone a lot more than she used to. When Shawn and I hang out it is amazing. We watched pulp fiction like twice. It's pretty tight. I had a lot of fun.

Sunday- I woke up early &Mark came and got me to go to church. We arrived at church &i got my coffee and did my share of complaining about not having a spoon. Haha. The lesson that was taught in church seemed to again deal with my problem. It's like God sent me and mark to have eachothers backs &He is doing this to open my eyes more and more. After church we went to chads and he wasnt there so we got changed and drove to the mall. We tried on a bunch of girls pants and we got smoothies and some fried rice. hahha. we are messy eaters. Then after a little bit we decided to leave, so we stopped by chads and picked him up &picked up steph. We all went back to marks &we watched Detroit Rock City. Before we knew it we had to get ready to go to small groups so we took them home and we waiting FOREVER for stephen and them to give us directions to this house. But we finally got there and it was awesome. The lesson that they mostly covered is that God made each of us talented in our own way &no one overpowers another person. After small groups Mark and I went to the park and we had a really long and emotional talk. It is times like those that i am so thankful i have mark as my bestfriend. He clears my mind so much and he can just connect with me on a way not many people can. He means so much to me. He could more then likely be the bestfriend i have in Ocala. <3. So after that we get into the car and it was just becomming sunset when the cop put a flashlight on us and asked us why we were there. We told him we were just talking and he said he had a report of a guy wearing black and a girl wearing black and we both were so at that point we were starting to freak out. He asked if we had anyone else withus and we said no, then he said that there was 3 guys and one girl, the gy had a whip and the girl had a mussle on her face. By this point me and mark look at eachother really scared, I had heard noises in the woods so this really scared me. But the officer ran his lisence and we went back to marks and picked up his mom and went to the grocery store because we were hungry. So we got some food and rented the movie "The Believer" we havent watched it all but so far its really good. So mark dropped me off at home and i thanked him for the wonderful day.<3

Today- DRAMA. djflksjdfkjsdkfj

Shawn was getting jealous of me and Mark and thought that marks intentions with me were more than they are. People have been telling shawn that mark likes me and that made side fights. but the main one truly involved, Shawn, Mark, &I. But mark called shawn and cleared everything up. Mark confronted me &basically told me that he didnt wanna hang out anymore and i was heartbroken and crying to shawn so shawn called him and told him basically that mark means so much to me and without him in my life then i would be so depressed. So i think everything is okay now.. A little akward but nothing terribly bad.

Tommorow i think i am going to hang out with Mark. I hope<3.
G'night

11:57 PM - 3 views - 12 eprops - 6 comments - email it

Friday, April 22, 2005

Alright.

Tonight was my chorus shit. & it was pretty good. I brought along my really really good friend mark and my friend steph.
They are amazing.

So basically we sang some songs.
the old people did their thing.
it was all good.
i hope they liked it.
I felt like they didnt.
But who knows.
I had a duet. It prob sucked. :[
I tripped on the risers. Yeah hahaha KLUTZ R US.

Yesterday a girl overdosed in school, She took zanex and a pint of vodka. Me and my friend prayed for her and it was so powerfull. I hope she's doing better.

I'm still trying to get over the death of Josh.
It all hit me like a bullet.
today was the first day i didnt cry.

&i better not start right now.

I'm going to shawns at 8 in the morning to spend the day with him. He better be glad i fucking love him, 8AM is earllly.
<3

Then theres church on sunday, and spending all day with Markface<3.
I cant wait.

:]

I met this really cool kid named Max. He's awesome. I hope we can get to know eachother better.

for myself. for my friends. for my family. STRAIGHT FUCKING EDGE.

[[[[edddittttt]]

what would you do ifff.

1. I Committed Suicide:
2. I Said I Liked You:
3. I Kissed You:
4. I Lived Next Door To You:
5. I Started Smoking:
6. I Stole Something:
7. I Was Hospitalized:
8. I Ran Away From Home:
9. I Got Into A Fight And You Weren't There:
10. I Said I Love You And Meant It:

10:59 PM - 4 views - 16 eprops - 11 comments - email it

Thursday, April 21, 2005

Currently Playing
O God, The Aftermath
By Norma Jean
see related

Wow.

It's been too long.

I'd like everyone to know that i have been trying really hard to find God, and i think i am finding him <33 he was closer than i thought. Tonight i read some of the bible and it has opened up my eyes so much.<3.

Me and mark are going to start going every wednesday and sunday mornings, and sunday nights<3.

I am straight-edge so everyone knows. &It's not for the scene or anything, it's to better myself. I dont need drugs to make me happy. I do not want to follow in my fathers footsteps. I do not want to be another statistic. I dont need alcohol, sex, and drugs to satisfy me.

I am Vegetarian again. I'm taking it steps at a time to rebuild what i had going.

Me &Shawn are doing AMAZING.<33. i love him sooo much.

I have been making new friends &they have impacted my life so much;;

-They have opened my eyes to God

-They have made me feel welcome in a new town

-Accepted me for who i am.

-Care for me and have my back

-I dont have to worry about peer pressure on drugs and alcohol because i try to stick with my SxE friends.

I'd like to thank you all;;

-Shawn, Andy, Richard, Robert, Mark, Chad, Dan, Steph, Amanda, Ian, Nick, Mel, lauren, [walt, fletcher;; even though we dont know eachother too well] Britt, Alex, Blair, Erica,Sam, Ashley, Meghan, Mason, jackie, Robbie, Dan, Ben, Casey, I'd like to thank God.<3. &there are so many more friends, i could name millions. If i forgot you, please forgive me.

I have an amazing life. &I have amazing people in it. I would never do anything to loose what I have.

I have lost friends &made many, I have learned from my mistakes, Changed for the better, I have found who i want to be, &I love life.

-I have learned something that most people already know;;; but i find it rediculous.

If i girl has sex. Shes a slut; If a boy has sex. He is awarded.

If a girl beats someone up. Shes insane; If a boy beats someone up. He's tough shit.

blah<3.

I'm going to get some sleep.

G'night <3

12:30 AM - 17 views - 28 eprops - 19 comments - email it

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